DEAR DEIDRE: SEEING as my boyfriend constantly thought I was cheating and was always accusing me, I thought I might as well play away.
We have been together for three years and for the last two he has been pretty much convinced I’m having an affair.
It’s been exhausting to constantly reassure him that I’m not.
Every time I go out with friends he quizzes me about who I spoke to.
He cross-examines me about my male colleagues and regularly suggests I’m looking at other men in the street.
None of it has been true — until recently.
For the past month I have been having sex with one of our friends.
I am 32 and my partner is 33. He works away a lot and spends little time with me when he is home.
He slumps in front of the football. If I try to discuss how lonely I feel, he shuts me down.
I wanted my social life back so I started going out with friends to cheer myself up.
I have always hit it off with one of our mutual mates.
It was harmless fun at first but one night when out, I was feeling pretty low and he noticed.
His hand was on my knee under the table and he held it there until I could hardly contain myself.
He got up and left, but texted me saying to meet him in the car park.
I found an excuse and went outside. We got in his car and were all over each other.
We drove somewhere quiet and did what we both longed for.
It felt great. We have been doing the same every week since. I think I love him and he says he loves me.
I now want the full package — marriage and children with my lover.
I’m determined to finish with my partner but he is a very good friend and I don’t want to lose that
